Monthly Archives: June 2012

Here where lucifearia and utopia must meet

Standard

                                         Here where lucifearia and utopia must meet.

 

Ah summer is returned to us : brightness and warmth to dispel the damp of a prolonged deluge. I am grateful 🙂 I dislike feeling cheated out of summer, so long awaited, so deeply needed. And now that I have so many babies to raise in the allotment it is even more pressing a need. Life in this sector of the planet is not balanced, and I admit to never having acclimatised myself to the huge swing between a 6 hour day and a 20 hour day of light. I have a horror of the land of the midnight sun, especially during the depth of winter when the sun never manages to peek above the horizon. Sunlight has always been very important to me, so it is quite intriguing to me to be introduced to the concept of being a light emitter in my own right. The idea that our bodies are holders and radiators of energetic rays measurable on the spectrum of light is fascinating. I grew up with the picture and the notion of Jesus as the Light of the world, banishing the forces of darkness with His Presence. But now to come to a realisation that I myself am a light carrier and conveyor, and that the forces of darkness cannot remain in my effulgence whilst it is aligned with the Christic Light sealed within me, is both an awesome and a sobering thought.

 

Yet the burden of responsibility for this role as Lightbearer only weighs on my rational mind, endlessly playing catchup with the rest of my consciousness like some pitifully crippled child, anxious to be included but afraid of being knocked over. The totality of my being is right at home and up for it! It is of course our natural condition, from before we got so distracted, upended and scattered. And yet the truth that even or especially this phase of our story was intentional and allowed for sort of knocks the wind out of its sails, doesn’t it? If everything is indeed in Divine Right Order, and God’s Plan of Perfection is unfolding exactly as it should, which it must be as He is Omniscient and never took His guiding hand from our shoulder, then what could there possibly be to fear but the demons of the unknown which are not even real? Do we continue like frightened children or rather step fully purposely and willingly into our own Divinely appointed role as bearers of Divine Light? For the longest time I was in hesitation, because the name Lucifer synonymous with satan the epitome of evil, means Lightbearer………….so what if there is this whole other fake light we could be induced like moths to the flame by? How to discern light from light, indeed? Having been taught that the devil, being angelic, if fallen, is multitudinously more clever than me and consequently capable of fooling the best of us with his guile deception and lies, how to distinguish between the various forces acting upon me?

 

Luckily for me I have always been capable of casting critical questions at authoritarian and societal norms. Consequently most of my views are diametrically different to those apparently held and practised by the masses. Numero uno is my innate respect for the sanctity of all life, which led me to veganism as the fundamentally least harmful way to be. From that firm foundation it has been arguably easier for me to extend the circle of my compassion out to my fellow man in all of his self wrought suffering and deliberate cruelty. A rather morbid fascination with the issue of wickedness, and how it has been both harnessed and disguised by control figures in order to promulgate evil. Human unkind’s right of free choice turned into a weapon of mass destruction because we innately fear it, and thereby hand over the reins of our power to those we have been duped into believing are superior decision makers. Forbid that we get it wrong! Forbid that we make fools of ourselves! But consider this my beloveds, what if there is no way to be wrong? What if that concept too is a weapon turned against us? For surely all the evidence points to humanity going down the pan precisely because we have refused to take up our personal power, out of deliberately induced fear?

 

I was taught as a child that I have an unerring internal compass called my conscience, which always alerts me to sub-optimal choices before they escape the contemplation stage. So, simply, if we never allow ourselves to entertain negative dark vengeful or fear thoughts in any of their guises, then we cannot stray from our true path, can we? The problem has been the tarnishing of the reflective mirror that constitutes our conscience, and of how the light we echo one to another has been progressively dimmed by the shadowplay and supposition so ubiquitously spread. A blind man when asked how he saw, replied  “feelingly”. Aha, feelingly, yes, therein lies a jewel of apprehending and perception open to us all, if we did but listen to it’s constant call. Babies and little children respond to theirs instantaneously, crying at unpleasant and laughing at pleasant sensations which occur in them. But we have become so numbed by the escalating scale of horror and violence, fed hourly by the mass media and mass medication industries of death, abuse and imprisonment.  We have learned to repress override ignore and cancel our sensate signals, in order to follow the agenda and orders of ‘civilisation’. I like that Amerindian quote that reminds us: “Before the white man came we had no prisons and therefore no criminals. If a man had no horse or tent he was provided with them.” wow! How simple, how very like Jesus’ teaching to feed the hungry, comfort the afflicted, clothe the naked………..so what distinguished the invading white man from the native people who lived in sustainable harmony with their environment? It is more than weight of numbers, especially when you look deeper and appreciate that we are not billions of separate entities but very much a collective as a species. How could we have allowed our principles and standards to drop so fast and so far? Books have been written by better minds than mine, and I deliberately choose to focus upon being part of the solution rather than further underlining the problem. Anyone who reads my blogs or scans my posts on facebook ought to have recognised the thread of the truth given to me to share : attack thoughts in any form including the idea of defense, for defense is merely disguised reason to attack…………any violence perpetrated especially upon the most innocent and vulnerable, any subscription to the concept of ownership, hoarding and security we have been progressively duped into signing…….. these must be ripped out of our hearts and torn from our minds. For these fake contracts are slowly but surely suffocating and killing us all. Very soon now I shall write my last words, so let me make them beautiful and precise ones. I can do no better than Jesus Himself who told us:

“Love one another as I have loved you”

for “other” read any apparent non self which appears in your sphere, under whatever form and guise they show themselves. Be not discriminating about who or what you extend your love to, for we are all part of the indivisible whole, and therefore not loving any aspect is to condemn us all to the downward spiral of suffering and rejection, condemnation and hell. If the devil himself appears before you he cannot long remain whilst you hold the impenetrable forcefield of love unwaveringly around yourself. Fear is the only thing we need to banish, and that happens automatically when the truth that only love is ultimately real is accepted and practised fully. Ignore the multitude of distractions, the enticements to judge and spurn, the delectation of temptation and the apparent ubiquity of sin. Follow rather the evidence of love which is in all created things. The exquisite beauty of nature moved Saint Francis to ecstasy, and he was moved to preach to the fish in the sea, and to commune with the birds of the air, and to harm none. Veganism in action right there. How very tragic then to witness most present day followers of Francis as they munch on corpses and dine on death, sup on trauma and absorb terror which the animals endured so unnecessarily. Whilst I am not in any way casting any other slur upon the Godly work they are doing, it is my bounden duty to point out that even in my lifetime Franciscans used to practise abstinence from flesh foods as essential an aspect of their lives as celibacy. So too with the Benedictines, is this not so?

 

Practise then what you preach, people! Be love, demonstrated. Be compassion in action. And embrace whatever aspect of your shadow it has been your habit to hide from yourself………… all that is petty and mean, unworthy and unkind does not need to be tousled with but merely illuminated by the ever brightening effulgence which is shining from your deepest essence. And so together we shall shine away the nothing that the dream of darkness was, and come fully to be the light, and the love, that we are. End the struggle which can only intensify the polarity;  trust, and allow God to move through us unimpeded by the resistance of the spirit of unworthiness. Undeserving we might be but still and eternally He loves us! It is in spurning that Love we surrender ourselves to its opposite. Please study “A Course in Miracles” which puts these things so very much more clearly and eloquently than  I do.

Now that I have shared the message given to me I am free to walk in the light! Enjoy the sunshine whilst you may xxxxxxxxxx

HERE WHERE LUCIFEARIA AND UTOPIA MUST MEET

Standard

                                         Here where lucifearia and utopia must meet.

 

                 Ah summer is returned to us : brightness and warmth to dispel the damp of a prolonged deluge. I am grateful 🙂 I dislike feeling cheated out of summer, so long awaited, so deeply needed. And now that I have so many babies to raise in the allotment it is even more pressing a need. Life in this sector of the planet is not balanced, and I admit to never having acclimatised myself to the huge swing between a 6 hour day and a 20 hour day of light. I have a horror of the land of the midnight sun, especially during the depth of winter when the sun never manages to peek above the horizon. Sunlight has always been very important to me, so it is quite intriguing to me to be introduced to the concept of being a light emitter in my own right. The idea that our bodies are holders and radiators of energetic rays measurable on the spectrum of light is fascinating. I grew up with the picture and the notion of Jesus as the Light of the world, banishing the forces of darkness with His Presence. But now to come to a realisation that I myself am a light carrier and conveyor, and that the forces of darkness cannot remain in my effulgence whilst it is aligned with the Christic Light sealed within me, is both an awesome and a sobering thought.

 

              Yet the burden of responsibility for this role as Lightbearer only weighs on my rational mind, endlessly playing catchup with the rest of my consciousness like some pitifully crippled child, anxious to be included but afraid of being knocked over. The totality of my being is right at home and up for it! It is of course our natural condition, from before we got so distracted, upended and scattered. And yet the truth that even or especially this phase of our story was intentional and allowed for sort of knocks the wind out of its sails, doesn’t it? If everything is indeed in Divine Right Order, and God’s Plan of Perfection is unfolding exactly as it should, which it must be as He is Omniscient and never took His guiding hand from our shoulder, then what could there possibly be to fear but the demons of the unknown which are not even real? Do we continue like frightened children or rather step fully purposely and willingly into our own Divinely appointed role as bearers of Divine Light? For the longest time I was in hesitation, because the name Lucifer synonymous with satan the epitome of evil, means Lightbearer………….so what if there is this whole other fake light we could be induced like moths to the flame by? How to discern light from light, indeed? Having been taught that the devil, being angelic, if fallen, is multitudinously more clever than me and consequently capable of fooling the best of us with his guile deception and lies, how to distinguish between the various forces acting upon me?

 

             Luckily for me I have always been capable of casting critical questions at authoritarian and societal norms. Consequently most of my views are diametrically different to those apparently held and practised by the masses. Numero uno is my innate respect for the sanctity of all life, which led me to veganism as the fundamentally least harmful way to be. From that firm foundation it has been arguably easier for me to extend the circle of my compassion out to my fellow man in all of his self wrought suffering and deliberate cruelty. A rather morbid fascination with the issue of wickedness, and how it has been both harnessed and disguised by control figures in order to promulgate evil. Human unkind’s right of free choice turned into a weapon of mass destruction because we innately fear it, and thereby hand over the reins of our power to those we have been duped into believing are superior decision makers. Forbid that we get it wrong! Forbid that we make fools of ourselves! But consider this my beloveds, what if there is no way to be wrong? What if that concept too is a weapon turned against us? For surely all the evidence points to humanity going down the pan precisely because we have refused to take up our personal power, out of deliberately induced fear?

 

            I was taught as a child that I have an unerring internal compass called my conscience, which always alerts me to sub-optimal choices before they escape the contemplation stage. So, simply, if we never allow ourselves to entertain negative dark vengeful or fear thoughts in any of their guises, then we cannot stray from our true path, can we? The problem has been the tarnishing of the reflective mirror that constitutes our conscience, and of how the light we echo one to another has been progressively dimmed by the shadowplay and supposition so ubiquitously spread. A blind man when asked how he saw, replied  “feelingly”. Aha, feelingly, yes, therein lies a jewel of apprehending and perception open to us all, if we did but listen to it’s constant call. Babies and little children respond to theirs instantaneously, crying at unpleasant and laughing at pleasant sensations which occur in them. But we have become so numbed by the escalating scale of horror and violence, fed hourly by the mass media and mass medication industries of death, abuse and imprisonment.  We have learned to repress override ignore and cancel our sensate signals, in order to follow the agenda and orders of ‘civilisation’. I like that Amerindian quote that reminds us: “Before the white man came we had no prisons and therefore no criminals. If a man had no horse or tent he was provided with them.” wow! How simple, how very like Jesus’ teaching to feed the hungry, comfort the afflicted, clothe the naked………..so what distinguished the invading white man from the native people who lived in sustainable harmony with their environment? It is more than weight of numbers, especially when you look deeper and appreciate that we are not billions of separate entities but very much a collective as a species. How could we have allowed our principles and standards to drop so fast and so far? Books have been written by better minds than mine, and I deliberately choose to focus upon being part of the solution rather than further underlining the problem. Anyone who reads my blogs or scans my posts on facebook ought to have recognised the thread of the truth given to me to share : attack thoughts in any form including the idea of defense, for defense is merely disguised reason to attack…………any violence perpetrated especially upon the most innocent and vulnerable, any subscription to the concept of ownership, hoarding and security we have been progressively duped into signing…….. these must be ripped out of our hearts and torn from our minds. For these fake contracts are slowly but surely suffocating and killing us all. Very soon now I shall write my last words, so let me make them beautiful and precise ones. I can do no better than Jesus Himself who told us:

“Love one another as I have loved you”

for “other” read any apparent non self which appears in your sphere, under whatever form and guise they show themselves. Be not discriminating about who or what you extend your love to, for we are all part of the indivisible whole, and therefore not loving any aspect is to condemn us all to the downward spiral of suffering and rejection, condemnation and hell. If the devil himself appears before you he cannot long remain whilst you hold the impenetrable forcefield of love unwaveringly around yourself. Fear is the only thing we need to banish, and that happens automatically when the truth that only love is ultimately real is accepted and practised fully. Ignore the multitude of distractions, the enticements to judge and spurn, the delectation of temptation and the apparent ubiquity of sin. Follow rather the evidence of love which is in all created things. The exquisite beauty of nature moved Saint Francis to ecstasy, and he was moved to preach to the fish in the sea, and to commune with the birds of the air, and to harm none. Veganism in action right there. How very tragic then to witness most present day followers of Francis as they munch on corpses and dine on death, sup on trauma and absorb terror which the animals endured so unnecessarily. Whilst I am not in any way casting any other slur upon the Godly work they are doing, it is my bounden duty to point out that even in my lifetime Franciscans used to practise abstinence from flesh foods as essential an aspect of their lives as celibacy. So too with the Benedictines, is this not so?

 

            Practise then what you preach, people! Be love, demonstrated. Be compassion in action. And embrace whatever aspect of your shadow it has been your habit to hide from yourself………… all that is petty and mean, unworthy and unkind does not need to be tousled with but merely illuminated by the ever brightening effulgence which is shining from your deepest essence. And so together we shall shine away the nothing that the dream of darkness was, and come fully to be the light, and the love, that we are. End the struggle which can only intensify the polarity;  trust, and allow God to move through us unimpeded by the resistance of the spirit of unworthiness. Undeserving we might be but still and eternally He loves us! It is in spurning that Love we surrender ourselves to its opposite. Please study “A Course in Miracles” which puts these things so very much more clearly and eloquently than  I do.

And now that i have delivered my message I am released to walk in the light that calls me outdoors – enjoy it whilst you may xxxxxxxxxxxx

HERE WHERE LUCIFEARIA AND UTOPIA MUST MEET

Standard

                                         Here where lucifearia and utopia must meet.

 

                 Ah summer is returned to us : brightness and warmth to dispel the damp of a prolonged deluge. I am grateful 🙂 I dislike feeling cheated out of summer, so long awaited, so deeply needed. And now that I have so many babies to raise in the allotment it is even more pressing a need. Life in this sector of the planet is not balanced, and I admit to never having acclimatised myself to the huge swing between a 6 hour day and a 20 hour day of light. I have a horror of the land of the midnight sun, especially during the depth of winter when the sun never manages to peek above the horizon. Sunlight has always been very important to me, so it is quite intriguing to me to be introduced to the concept of being a light emitter in my own right. The idea that our bodies are holders and radiators of energetic rays measurable on the spectrum of light is fascinating. I grew up with the picture and the notion of Jesus as the Light of the world, banishing the forces of darkness with His Presence. But now to come to a realisation that I myself am a light carrier and conveyor, and that the forces of darkness cannot remain in my effulgence whilst it is aligned with the Christic Light sealed within me, is both an awesome and a sobering thought.

 

              Yet the burden of responsibility for this role as Lightbearer only weighs on my rational mind, endlessly playing catchup with the rest of my consciousness like some pitifully crippled child, anxious to be included but afraid of being knocked over. The totality of my being is right at home and up for it! It is of course our natural condition, from before we got so distracted, upended and scattered. And yet the truth that even or especially this phase of our story was intentional and allowed for sort of knocks the wind out of its sails, doesn’t it? If everything is indeed in Divine Right Order, and God’s Plan of Perfection is unfolding exactly as it should, which it must be as He is Omniscient and never took His guiding hand from our shoulder, then what could there possibly be to fear but the demons of the unknown which are not even real? Do we continue like frightened children or rather step fully purposely and willingly into our own Divinely appointed role as bearers of Divine Light? For the longest time I was in hesitation, because the name Lucifer synonymous with satan the epitome of evil, means Lightbearer………….so what if there is this whole other fake light we could be induced like moths to the flame by? How to discern light from light, indeed? Having been taught that the devil, being angelic, if fallen, is multitudinously more clever than me and consequently capable of fooling the best of us with his guile deception and lies, how to distinguish between the various forces acting upon me?

 

             Luckily for me I have always been capable of casting critical questions at authoritarian and societal norms. Consequently most of my views are diametrically different to those apparently held and practised by the masses. Numero uno is my innate respect for the sanctity of all life, which led me to veganism as the fundamentally least harmful way to be. From that firm foundation it has been arguably easier for me to extend the circle of my compassion out to my fellow man in all of his self wrought suffering and deliberate cruelty. A rather morbid fascination with the issue of wickedness, and how it has been both harnessed and disguised by control figures in order to promulgate evil. Human unkind’s right of free choice turned into a weapon of mass destruction because we innately fear it, and thereby hand over the reins of our power to those we have been duped into believing are superior decision makers. Forbid that we get it wrong! Forbid that we make fools of ourselves! But consider this my beloveds, what if there is no way to be wrong? What if that concept too is a weapon turned against us? For surely all the evidence points to humanity going down the pan precisely because we have refused to take up our personal power, out of deliberately induced fear?

 

            I was taught as a child that I have an unerring internal compass called my conscience, which always alerts me to sub-optimal choices before they escape the contemplation stage. So, simply, if we never allow ourselves to entertain negative dark vengeful or fear thoughts in any of their guises, then we cannot stray from our true path, can we? The problem has been the tarnishing of the reflective mirror that constitutes our conscience, and of how the light we echo one to another has been progressively dimmed by the shadowplay and supposition so ubiquitously spread. A blind man when asked how he saw, replied  “feelingly”. Aha, feelingly, yes, therein lies a jewel of apprehending and perception open to us all, if we did but listen to it’s constant call. Babies and little children respond to theirs instantaneously, crying at unpleasant and laughing at pleasant sensations which occur in them. But we have become so numbed by the escalating scale of horror and violence, fed hourly by the mass media and mass medication industries of death, abuse and imprisonment.  We have learned to repress override ignore and cancel our sensate signals, in order to follow the agenda and orders of ‘civilisation’. I like that Amerindian quote that reminds us: “Before the white man came we had no prisons and therefore no criminals. If a man had no horse or tent he was provided with them.” wow! How simple, how very like Jesus’ teaching to feed the hungry, comfort the afflicted, clothe the naked………..so what distinguished the invading white man from the native people who lived in sustainable harmony with their environment? It is more than weight of numbers, especially when you look deeper and appreciate that we are not billions of separate entities but very much a collective as a species. How could we have allowed our principles and standards to drop so fast and so far? Books have been written by better minds than mine, and I deliberately choose to focus upon being part of the solution rather than further underlining the problem. Anyone who reads my blogs or scans my posts on facebook ought to have recognised the thread of the truth given to me to share : attack thoughts in any form including the idea of defense, for defense is merely disguised reason to attack…………any violence perpetrated especially upon the most innocent and vulnerable, any subscription to the concept of ownership, hoarding and security we have been progressively duped into signing…….. these must be ripped out of our hearts and torn from our minds. For these fake contracts are slowly but surely suffocating and killing us all. Very soon now I shall write my last words, so let me make them beautiful and precise ones. I can do no better than Jesus Himself who told us:

“Love one another as I have loved you”

for “other” read any apparent non self which appears in your sphere, under whatever form and guise they show themselves. Be not discriminating about who or what you extend your love to, for we are all part of the indivisible whole, and therefore not loving any aspect is to condemn us all to the downward spiral of suffering and rejection, condemnation and hell. If the devil himself appears before you he cannot long remain whilst you hold the impenetrable forcefield of love unwaveringly around yourself. Fear is the only thing we need to banish, and that happens automatically when the truth that only love is ultimately real is accepted and practised fully. Ignore the multitude of distractions, the enticements to judge and spurn, the delectation of temptation and the apparent ubiquity of sin. Follow rather the evidence of love which is in all created things. The exquisite beauty of nature moved Saint Francis to ecstasy, and he was moved to preach to the fish in the sea, and to commune with the birds of the air, and to harm none. Veganism in action right there. How very tragic then to witness most present day followers of Francis as they munch on corpses and dine on death, sup on trauma and absorb terror which the animals endured so unnecessarily. Whilst I am not in any way casting any other slur upon the Godly work they are doing, it is my bounden duty to point out that even in my lifetime Franciscans used to practise abstinence from flesh foods as essential an aspect of their lives as celibacy. So too with the Benedictines, is this not so?

 

            Practise then what you preach, people! Be love, demonstrated. Be compassion in action. And embrace whatever aspect of your shadow it has been your habit to hide from yourself………… all that is petty and mean, unworthy and unkind does not need to be tousled with but merely illuminated by the ever brightening effulgence which is shining from your deepest essence. And so together we shall shine away the nothing that the dream of darkness was, and come fully to be the light, and the love, that we are. End the struggle which can only intensify the polarity;  trust, and allow God to move through us unimpeded by the resistance of the spirit of unworthiness. Undeserving we might be but still and eternally He loves us! It is in spurning that Love we surrender ourselves to its opposite. Please study “A Course in Miracles” which puts these things so very much more clearly and eloquently than  I do.

And now that i have delivered my message I am released to walk in the light that calls me outdoors – enjoy it whilst you may xxxxxxxxxxxx

REVELATION IS FOR SHARING

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REVELATION IS FOR SHARING

I am happy today 🙂
how do I know?
Because I am not unhappy…..not in pain, not sad about the state of the world, as I so frequently am.
What, then is different about today?
Today is a special day, with a special feeling of anticipation that something wonderful is happening, right now………..almost as if the floor of my life is being peeled away, and what formerly appeared to be old worn lino is lifted away to uncover the living breathing responsive vibrant mossy ground of my true being – ahhh!
Oooh so revelation of true ground of beingness, no less 😉
yep!
Awesome!
Surely is, and this is just the beginning – the base layer ground level………..
for the longest time have I been beavering away at the subterranean level of my being : excavating / mining / tunnelling / digging………you get it, finding my real roots and hidden depths kind of intense focussed hard work.
Ah, and how do you know that phase is completed then?
Because the lino is peeling away 🙂
oh yes you said that, brilliant. So what happens next?
Anything I wish, anything I desire, anything I place the focus of my awareness upon.
Oooh, cooool……….as long as you’re not thinking of negative stuff though, right?
Oh I am so very far beyond mental traps like that….slid into and crawled out of too many pits and sloughs to fall for them ever again.
How come you’re so sure of that, I mean even to the point of sounding a tad arrogant?
I am in the directors chair now, the drivers seat, the painters brush is in my hand, or whatever simile you like to use. I realise that it has been habits of reaction formed by years of conditioning which placed a lethally dark shadow upon my viewpoint. Now having come to terms with, found forgiveness for, all of that which brought me to this present point of nowness, unscattered and awake, unfazed and aware, there is no thing to worry about. All and everything is indeed unfolding exactly as it should in Divine Right Order. There is no fail, no wrong choice and no mistake, no accident and no hidden demon. Everything is out in the open, declared, clear, perspicacious and obvious.
You feel to be the power in your own life then?
No I am not, God is the Power, I am merely His instrument. For the last decade and more I have been attempting to discern His Will for me, and to escape my petty little will. Now I understand that these are one and the same, when I am authentically joined up. The small desires were only ever the product of misdirected energy, and reaching for some unknown comfort and security in a profoundly disorientated and twisted environment.
Uhuh..
being whole, complete, and entirely here and now, whilst simultaneously holding awareness of my multi-dimensional aspects raying out in every direction and plane of existence, whilst meeting in my very centre and balance point,. The epicentric replaced the egocentric. But I had to come to a point of zero conflict with the egoic consciousness : neither repelling nor being pushed by it, do you see? I once imagined the ego to be my enemy and consequently sought to demolish it, but it only grew larger. Then I attempted to live in peace with it but it only caused disruption. Finally I came to a place of resolving the tension, by letting go of my side of the rope, so to speak. As with children and water, if you refrain from imposing boundaries upon them they find their own level and settle.
So similarly did it come to pass with my learned patterns of reactivity. When one is at zero gravity there is no efforting to get there or remain there – zero gravity being the sweet spot of perfect poise in acrobatics, the zone of effortless stillness in motion of martial arts, the nirvanah of meditation, the awareness of the Presence of God right here within the high sacred heart around which all revolves in perfect harmony. It is the end of struggle and the beginning of the dance, the settled space where all is clarity not chaos………as if being perceived from outer space in its totality and nonattachment. This point is usually only attained at death in humans because of the myriad accrued miasmic maya. But when one is prepared by acceptance of self, circumstance, and at peace with everything, thanks to the special Graces of this epochal time of completion and resolution, where all things/beings recognise themselves as One whole : spiritual ascension occurs. So one passes beyond duality and polarisation. The end of the time-bound circumstantial state. And finds ones Self still embodied : all that has passed away were the illusions of separation, need and lack. What died were the attachments and issues which so preoccupied the former life. Serene omnipresence results from this passage through the narrow gateless aperture………I recall during shamanic training reaching a psychic inner threshold and being asked “Are you worthy to pass through this door?”
“Yes, I am worthy” came my response, even as a doubting part of me willed to shrink back from this bright observation point where nothing can remain hidden. That small part of me was amazed that I could dare to pronounce myself worthy, when she had grown up feeling unworthy, not good enough etc. She succeeded in distracting me sufficiently that I became once again circumscribed and in self imposed limitation. Who did I think I was, came a familiar maternal voice nagging and slapping with her slipper round my legs – get back in that cage and shut up!

On another occasion of near death experience, I found myself among a host of angelic beings of every shade and hue imaginable, each uniquely different and none superior in any way to any seeming other. It was obvious then that my own true colours were equally beautiful and complimentary, and in no way clashed with any other colours. There was some understanding that those who had endured particular experiences whilst incarnated, such as having murdered another, having sacrificed themselves for others, and so on, wore a particularly distinctive garment of light, so to speak. All were honoured the same, no distinction or preference, no hierarchy or judgement belonged at this place removed from such splittist sentiments. It might be as if those who were without legs wore blue and those without eyes wore green, for example, and there was no preferentiality, merely acknowledgement of the cross each had borne. The plain fact was that every apparently separate, but in truth conjoin ed, one of us there, had been required to attain a point of acceptance – beyond pity, denial, or struggle with who and what we had been / done in order to reach this place. There was no sorrow here whatsoever, there was only joyfilled levity and mutual honouring of the Divinity of Us as formerly fractured aspects now restored to Oneness.

I am just reminded of an early experience of non-disdain / non-disgust at my fellow man where I transcended the learned practice of scornful finger-pointing disdainfulness. It was whilst observing a family who had left a revolting mess of used nappies and other filth deliberately behind for others to clear up. I was at a camp site in Wales with my brother, long before I became a mother, and he was vociferously condemning these “lowlifes”. Somehow I found myself in a place of zero disgust, and complete nonjudgment. Thinking about that here and now, I imagine it could be the way animals are not snootily disgusted by whatever they witness other creatures doing, or about where they happen to be…….. there was a non-local awareness or dis-awareness. Or maybe it could better be described as a state of elevated compassion and non-irritation? I am not conveying it very well am I……….. suffice it to say it was a much calmer place to be experiencing from than where my normal stance would have been. How much of our normal reactions are obviously conditioned and learned and copied from others! This accounts for a great deal of prejudice, and the whole nasty human trait of making of themselves a special group or status for the specific goal of excluding others. Classism, speciesism, ageism, elitism………. all designed to differentiate us from one another when what we really need to be doing is transcending every apparent difference and focussing on that which unites us.

Another time I was moved to sit down beside a tramp and sing to him, from a space beyond pity or fear or even of interest ; purely as an act of giving, upliftment, sharing, solidarity, inspiration……… but beyond all such conceptualisations also. It was not until my self-consciousness returned as my singing came to a point of closure that I noticed the eyes of others upon me, for I had been singing with closed eyes, just my voice offered up to alleviate perhaps some pain, and to vocalise my overwhelming desire to express my gratitude to God for being alive and sentient. I happened to find myself, alone in Barcelona with 3 hours to get through and not being remotely interested in looking at anything……….it was however not until I had stood up, turned and bowed to my companion with respectful aknowledgement of His Godhood hidden yet revealed, and was walking away congratulating myself for having done a selfless act of being an earthangel for a. n. Other, that I heard a titter of Angelic laughter about my ears and the hilarity as they said:
“She thinks that she was the angel for him – hee hee how funny is that!”
When all along it was of course the opposite. I had been the one out of my depth in the city, uncomfortable and self-conscious, needing a place to rest from the babble and strife of the rushing teeming traffic of humanity. That was a humblingly humorous moment for me, for the angels were not laughing at me nor poking scornful fingers, but hugging me in a delightful embrace as one does a child in compassionate heart-opened delight at their innocent strivings. Indeed that being who had taken the form of a tramp and caused me to feel moved to sit next to him and sing, was probably angelic. He might even have been Christ in disguise, as some have alluded to
And yet it was not opposite either, for at that time and for that space there was no tramp, no ruth, no throng…..there was a praising and worshipful offering, in the dimension of sound, and doubtless others too, straight to God from the one place of reverential gratitude and awe.
I like being in that place – it is expansive, warm, and safe.
It is the palm of God.
I am in that place now, and that is why today is a happy day 🙂